Friday, February 26, 2010

I've Just Been Chased By THREE DOGS!!!!


If you know me at all...You'd know that once your not a human being we can't be friends.  

NAAHHH!  I just cant believe in you...! NOPE!!

Hamsters, Gerbles, Rats, Donkeys, Goats...the like

Never! Just forget it!

So yea, Imagine this,

Its yesterday night...

Its late...

I'm standing in Brixton waiting for my bus home.  Due to the fact that green lane is closed... 

(If your lost when it comes to green lane don't worry...Just follow!...And maybe get out abit more..) 

...I can take more that just the one 250, I can also take the 109, which is a tad more frequent.  

So, yea... Brixton!  And o wow...theres the 109.  So obviously Ive got on it...and now im sitting down.  Somewhere in the journey theres a really REALLY smelly cat lady type woman and I'm just dying so I get off. 

It was only like a stop before the stop I should of got off.  But the smell was too much for me.. I'm not usually that bad when it comes to these kind of things but it was SOOO horrible.  And one thing in this life I can't seal with is bad smells!

But anyway thats SO not what I'm supposed to be talking about!

Back to the story....

I'm walking now...I've been walking for about 8 minutes...And I'm nearly home.

Then...As I turn a certain corner...I see a man.

No problem there..Just a black man on a dark night aged about 33, Yea...Thats fine.  

But you see...The problem is the fact that running in front of him are 3 puppies! 

Yea...

Thats a big problem.

Because thay looked like this... 


If your crazy, your tying to think that that thing is cute...Yea, I don't like you at this moment!!!

Because I'm looking at a murderer right there! Something with the capability of just gobbling me up!!!!

*Takes a calming breath*

Ok, so...Yea. Ive seen these devils running at these guys feet... n they've seen me! 

PROBLEM!!

Obviously I've stopped walking, because I just dont want any trouble,  But one of the dogs are making intimidating sounds at me!!

MAJOR PROBLEM!

Obviously I kno that this is gonna be eventful. And I'm just looking at the man.  You know, for a bit of moral support or something.

So he's making noises at his things!! And they're listening to him.  But I already know, that because these things are puppies they're not as tamed or trained! Basically theyre just killers!

In the hope that this guy knows what he's doing I've started walking now...

And yeah!......One of the devils has now decided that, No, I dont really want to focus on my owner...I wanna focus on you...

EXTREME MAJOR PROBLEM!!

I'm walking now,  But the devil is roaring at me! And so are his 2 demon brothers!!

....

And now, your chasing me!

......................

I

AM 

GONE!!!

I am now running for my life!!!! Because behind me are 3 devils trying to ake my life from me....

AND CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHY ON THIS EARTH THE BLACK MAN IS NOW SHOUTING...

In a very peacful unfazed tone may I add...

"Don't run, Stop running...Don't run!"

ALRIGHT!  So, I'm running like a jamacian, my hats just fallen of...And now I've just made a loud sound!...something to the effect of..."AHHHHHH!!!!"

Yeah! I've actually just gone..."AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Now, I'm embarrassed because I've just gone "AHHHH",  as I'm getting chased by 3 devils. And then to top it all of....I'm actually now jumping onto a bonnet of a car!  Yes I am...

Not only Have I just jumped onto a car but I'm now sliding off and holding on for dear life, because I don't know if I'm sliding into a dogs mouth, I don't know If it can get me up here and obviously I've just made a loud sound!

Its late...

Its a quiet road!

I'm standing on someones car....

My hat is on the floor back there....

AND THERE ARE NO DOGS ANYMORE!

I've just been chased by three dogs!

And I'm alive!

Ive just been chased by three dogs!!

Yea!

Ive just been chased by three dogs!

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