Rain, Benidorm, Christmas & Girlfriends!!

Monday 18th July, Fell asleep quickly last night (Paul McKenna must be working!!) I had one of my bizarre dreams. I seemed to manage or own a coffee shop like 'Costa' which also sold T-shirts with quirky slogans too, I was decorating the walls with framed T-Shirts & transfers of the quirky slogans. I stepped outside the building to check how it looked from the outside. It seemed to be a white Edwardian building & I felt like it was on the coast (Like the buildings in Brighton) Then I was in a bar waiting for people to arrive saving a group of seats for the rest of the gang, I went to the ladies & there was a load of coat hooks inside the door, a bit like the cloakroom area in a school. I said to a woman in there "I'd like to hang my coat up, but I'd not trust leaving it in the ladies toilet"  My Late mum & dad seemed to be renewing their wedding vows & were having a wedding ceremony. I got in what I thought was a white van, to take us to the church for the service, but it turned out to be a kind of classroom trailer, with windows, and rows of chairs in, the ceremony would be taking place inside.


I was in a long, white, satin, head-bridesmaid outfit, mum came in with all of the other bridesmaids who were in Barbie candy pink, mum was in white with a white top over a white satin pencil skirt, but her tights kept falling down round her knees & you could see the crotch of them hanging down through the split at the back of her satin skirt & she kept hoisting them up, in a rather ungainly fashion. Erdal lent over to me & whispered "They kept falling down earlier, I got her some hold up stockings, but she refused to wear them" I wondered why, or why she didn't just go bare legged?? I woke up at 8.30am wondering what the hell that was all about??

I got up had a wash tied my hair back in a ponytail, did my make-up & wore my 3/4 grey gym trousers, & V-necked striped white, beige, yellow & terracotta T-Shirt, by Daniel Hechter, white ankle socks & my white EASYTONE Reebok trainers, with my black, Velour, hooded, jogging jacket, by Petite Bateau & dashed out into the rain to the shop for my Sun paper. Then made Porridge with Goji berry's & a coffee for breakfast, downing some painkillers & got stuck into the paper. The front page was of David & Victoria Beckham & their 1st daughter Harper Seven (Bloody Stupid Name, all these years they keep trying for a girl & after 3 boys they get one & then give her a name that sounds like a boys name, followed by a number!!) They both posted pictures with their new daughter on Twitter & Facebook.

Proud Parents with Harper Seven

The Air Stewardess Kerry Meades who slept with Ashley Cole while he was wooing Cheryl, said he was a chain smoking slob, who guzzled fried chicken junk food in the wee hrs, after days of guzzling Vodka & Tequila, with the occasional fried breakfast, as soon as he woke he wanted a cigarette, she reckons he smokes around 30 a day (Not very healthy for a sportsman!!)


Forecaster's predict rain will lash Britain for the next 30 days, oh deep joy!!! NOT!! What happened to the hot Indian summer that was predicted this year? Storms are expected to whip in until August 16th (My Late Mums Birthday) Many areas were drenched by more than half the average July rainfall, between 12pm Saturday to 12pm Sunday (When I was most in pain!!)

Cancer rates have soared among the middle aged, the number diagnosed each year has leaped by more than a 3rd, doctors are blaming the rise in obesity & home boozing, but I know if I get it, it will be down to hereditary reasons. All 4 of my Grandparents died of Cancer, my Dad died of Cancer & nearly all of my Uncles & Aunts died of Cancer, even a load of my Cousins are battling it. It's an evil disease the sooner a cure is found the better!!... Prostrate Cancer rates have risen six-fold & Breast Cancer by half in people aged 40-59. Good news re Lung Cancer though (Which my dad died of) as diagnosis in men has fallen by more than half (Is that down to less men being smokers/heavy smokers??) Or less passive smoking in pubs, now there has been a smoking ban?

An enraged, moronic, Bradford van driver, chased an Ambulance, even going through red lights, then parked close to its rear doors, trapping paramedics & dying patient inside. All because the Ambulance clipped his wing mirror as they sped past!! Which was his own fault as when the Ambulance sirens were going all the traffic pulled aside to let the ambulance past, except for his van!!  What an absolute arsehole, the poor 42yr patient later died of a heart attack, while all the scum bag Electrician, Dale Barker 46, got was a years driving ban & 150hrs community service work. He should of been charged with manslaughter, who's to say the stress he caused, didn't make the heart attack situation worse for the patient!!?

A survey says Brits on average have sex once a year (Lucky bastards I'm on a winning streak if I get it once every 3yrs!!!) Tiredness & lack of time is what is normally to blame for the lack of sex. Yet 1/3rd found time to cheat (Not very successfully if they are still only getting sex once a week!!) The Welsh being the worst cheat offenders (Why does my mind immediately go to Ryan Giggs & Imogen Thomas??) Also M&S shoppers were more likely to take part in an orgy (This is not just any orgy, this is a Marks & Spencer finest orgy!!) also Bitter drinkers are most likely to wife swap (But they're wives are not bitter about it!!!)

Wales Land Of The Cheats!!

More BBC idiocy comes in the form that they have paid actors from 'React Acting For Business' £1million to pose as unhappy employee's, so that managers can learn how to handle fed-up workers (Surely they must have enough of the real thing after the BBC's decision to up sticks head office in London & re situate up north!!!) Another huge waste of TV licence payers money by the BBC well done!!!.....

It's grey and rainy out (No surprise as we are apparently stuck with this until August 16th at least!!) But while my pain level is bearable, I decided to do a 2hr power walk round the park to stop my joints seizing up & I took my friend Davids dogs Betty & Stanley along to keep me company & they seemed to have fun despite the weather. I was called on my mobile by the hospital while I was out & I have a MRI Scan appointment for Sunday 7th August at 2pm. Great the sooner that's done, the sooner treatment for my pain is decided!! I got home & made a Salad Baguette for lunch, which I had with some BBQ Beef McCoy Crisps & a Diet Coke.

I watched 'The Real Housewives Of Orange County' then did a load of laundry & washing up, Philip Gatward sent me one of the pictures from the Automatic Weapon shoot.

It's the one where I had to look haughty & bored while holding champagne in one hand & a VERY HEAVY Automatic Weapon in the other hand, casually as if it were light weight!.. He said it was a really popular pic from the weapon set & everyone liked it which is good to know..... Hopefully he will use me on other projects.

Had a vegetable Cup-a-soup & did a load of housework stopping to watch 'Home & Away' did a bunch of job searches after & applied for a load then, I roasted some parsnips & had with 2 Quorn burgers & mustard for dinner washed down with a Diet Coke. I watched the soaps then the eagerly awaited new Jason Manford show 'Show Me The Funny' OMG!! NEVER AGAIN!!! The shows format stinks more, than it's worse stand-up contestants!! That tripe's title should be done under the trade description act!! It had More fillers that Jordans trout pout!! 30mins in I was still waiting for the funny!!! 

I watched the 1st 30mins of waste of time filler, where the 10 were preparing to do stand up to a 100% female audience, 2 of the 10 had to work in a hairdressers, but there was no stipulation that meant they had to do a set based around hairdressers (So what was the fucking point!!?) Another two just had to find women called Maria in the street, none of it funny & all of it pointless!!! 


Then 45mins into the 1hr show, when the 10 acts finally got in front of the audience & the panel of judges, we didn't get to see them all!! WTF??? We only saw fragments of a few of their sets (Unless they were the ones that died on their arse, which were 2 in particular!!) While Jason critiqued them from the sidings, while all we could hear was a muffled noise that was the act on stage POINTLESS!!  It had more padding than a school girls bra & then when the acts (The Funny?) came on, we didn't get to see them!! So they didn't 'Show Us The Funny' In fact not one fragment of the show was funny, even the dressing down, of the god awful comics, by the comedian judging panel, lacked humour.


I most certainly will NOT be tuning in again! I do not know how many people tuned in tonight? But I will not be surprised if next weeks viewing figures are halved, or even less, what a stinker!!! They need to ditch the pointless tasks, if it has no relevance on their stand up topic! It's boring & it takes up over 50% of the show! They should just be set, a stand-up theme, do a short VT for each contestant Xfactor style before their act & show us each of the 10 9 contestants full acts. 


Then, if he has to, Jason could give his view on how he felt it went at the end of each act & at the end we can see each 9 grilled by the comedy experts!! That would probably be a much better show & last 30-45mins & not 1hr. If they want to pad it out for a hr, they could sandwich a bit of Jason's stand-up in between!! Left as it is, they will not be getting a 2nd series & the viewing figures will drop in droves!! EPIC FAIL TOTALLY DIRE!!!


Tonight The Sun website was hacked by LulzSec & a story was put up about Rupert Murdoch being dead (See pic below) of course word spread like wildfire on sites like Twitter & Facebook all who clicked on to look with Internet Explorer on their browser, got infected with a virus, that made the people who clicked on the hacked page, part of a Botnet, using a script that injects into Internet Explorer, all their computers request to go om Murdoch's sites causing a overload causing them to crash (See 2nd pic below) But Not those using Google Chrome or Firefox like me (Not that I bothered looking) Next newsint.co.uk was down and a bunch of other Murdoch owned news sites, many Twitter sites like BigBrotherXtra kept reporting more incidents as it broke

BigBrotherXtra Big Brother on FIVE. 

BREAKING news international admins freaked out and unplugged the nameserver ns0/ns1.newsint.co.uk --> more than 200 sites down

Hacked Sun Site With Fake Story 

How The Botnet Works 

Lord Rob, Jessye B, Jesse, Ariella, BB, Charlotte, Jay & Ocean

I watched E4's 'Dirty Sexy Things next, I don't find any of the models Sexy, Male or Female but I can appreciate BB, Jessye B & Lord Rob have good Torsos (Shame about the face & ego though Rob) Plus BB Jessye B & Ocean are photogenic. Jay is Awful totally unprofessional, scrawny & nothing special to look at, with his sticky out ears & mop of hair, he also has bad posture. He reminds me of a young version of the lead singer of Simple Minds, Jim Kerr. 


With his attitude he wont go far! Modeling is a business where you do as much as you can while your young as your shelf life is short, there is no time to piss about! Another pain in the ass model is Ariella, who wouldn't wear a thong body! Your a fucking model for fuck sake!! You wear what your given, even if it's 2 nipple tassels & a band-aid as a merkin!! UNBELIEVABLE!!... I like Jesse he has a good face & the right attitude (Even if he did slate Milan on camera, and his posturing isn't all it could be at times) Also he photograph's well despite being rather scrawny & weedy. Most of all though I like photographer Perou he takes fab pics, has fab concepts & takes no prisoners & tells it like it is!!

Then I watched new comedy Sirens (About an ambulance crew) Which is very good but can't look at Rachid (Phone Jacker) without expecting him to burst out into Terry Tibbs! By midnight I was struggling to stay awake so went to bed, so either Paul McKenna is working or 'Show Me The Funny' bored me to sleep!! (Calories consumed 1,644)


Tuesday 19th July, I dreamt but I can't recall it on waking, another gloomy day outside. I hurt in my back, neck & shoulder area but it's not as bad as it has been on previous days! But when I move my head I can hear the sound of crunching gravel in my ears, that's coming from my neck ..... ooooh sexy!!!..... NOT!! 


I got up jumped into the shower, wore grey 3/4 gym trousers, grey diamante trimmed vest top, my B&W TrimSoles & my black hooded Velour, Petite Bateau jogging top. Then I popped to the shop for a Sun paper. Got in, made myself a coffee & porridge with Goji Berry's and settled down with the paper. The front page is about The Saline Serial Killer, some crank who is contaminating Manchester Hospitals, saline drips, with insulin (By injecting them presumably) Sick Freak there are 3 victims who have died so far (There may be more though, as a connection has only recently been made!)

I'm not going to bother reading all the newspaper hacking witch hunts etc in the news as I'm bored with it now, 100's of  people who were not involved are losing their jobs, or being forced or told to resign over it, it's getting stupid! Some are even saying PM Cameron should resign, just because he associated with & employed someone, who is said to be involved (Who's involvement was year's ago, when Labour were in power anyway!!) Like the country is not in enough disarray already, without shifting the man in charge for no good reason, causing more turmoil!! FFS there are a lot more pressing issues than the Press Phone Hacking, people get a grip!! 


Yes there were people who's phones had no place being hacked, and deleting messages, in the phone of a murder victim, that could make her parents think she was alive, when she wasn't is obscenely bad, but its just a few bad apples in a barrel!!! Move on!! I'm Fucking bored with it! The latest now is the news that, the whistleblower Sean Hoare, has been found dead! The conspiracy theorists will now go into full drive now, even though he told friends recently he was very ill & he was well known to have drink & drugs problems!

It seems we The British are as confusingly complex as our weather, as 50% are fat, but we eat healthy & exercise too!! Where I live the South East of England fares pretty well in the different categories below.....

% Who Are Obese Or Overweight

1. Worst place, Scotland 52%


2. Best places, SE, NE & Northern Ireland 46%

% Who Drink 14+ Alcoholic Drinks A Week 

1. Worst place, NE 13%


2. South East 8%


3. Best place, London 6%

% Who Eat 2 Or More Takeaways Every Week

1. Worst place, London 31%


2. South East 9%


3. Best place, East Anglia 6%

Number Of Healthy Dinners Eaten Each Week 

1. Worst places, London, NW, Northern Ireland, Scotland, Wales & West Midlands with 3


2. Best places, East Anglia, East Midlands, NE, SE, SW, Yorks & Humberside with 4 (Not much!!)

% Who Get 8Hrs Sleep A Night (Not Me)

1. Worst place, Northern Ireland 10%


2. South East 13%


3. Best place, Yorks/Humberside 17%

% Of Gym Nuts That Go at Least Once A Week (Wouldn't call once a week a Gym Nut!!)

1. Worst place, Yorks/Humberside 60%


2. South East 68%


3. Best place, Northern Ireland 74%

Interesting that the place that gets the worst sleep Northern Ireland goes to the gym the most & the area that gets the most sleep Yorks/Humberside goes to the gym the least, the gym obviously makes you wide awake!!

It has also come out that Love Rat Ashley Cole Begged an American Lingerie Model he'd slept with, to send him nude pics, days before his reunion with Cheryl on her Birthday, that will cheer up Cheryl who is already devastated he slept with a Air stewardess days before their reunion, while he was wooing her back!


AT LAST!! Animal testing is to stop during the manufacture of household products, such as washing up liquid, polish, air freshener & bleach.... as it is possible to sell these items without inflicting unnecessarily pain on animals, about time too!! Cosmetic testing has been banned since 2008 I use to buy my make-up products from 'Beauty Without Cruelty' or from the brands on the R.S.P.C.A no animal testing list, before 2008!

It seems its not only idiots at the MoD who like to waste money stupidly!! The NHS have forked out £32 EACH for £2.25 EACH Gluten Free Loaves, used for prescriptions for patients with Coeliac Disease, who are unable to eat normal bread. But this kind of bread, unlike years ago, is now common place in shops, the huge mark up is being blamed on unscrupulous suppliers who hike up bread cost & then add administration fees. But come on, did no dick head question the price of £32 for a loaf of bread?? No amount of administration fees could bump a loaf up that much!! That makes the bread £2.48 a SLICE, that's 28p MORE than the price of the loaf if bought from a shop!! Are the NHS & MoD pen pushers all morons??? Paying these prices has run up a bill of £1.25Million in Wales alone!!! TOTAL MADNESS!! More examples of NHS lunacy below.....

1. Wheat-free gravy mix - Shop Price £2.59 - NHS Pay £15.21


2. Gluten-free pasta - Shop Price £3.20 - NHS Pay £11.54


3. Gluten-free - Shop Price £2.22 - NHS Pay £7.14


4. Gluten-fee Ginger Snaps - Shop Price £2.35 - NHS Pay £10.07

Would You Pay £32 For This??

Honeymoon Murder Suspect Shrien Dewani, is suspected of going to the gym & doing Marathon work outs, to send his health haywire, as a sly attempt to evade a court extradition to South Africa! As his intense workouts meant, that his medication had to be stopped, because the workouts were reacting with his anti-depressants sending his enzyme levels dangerously high. But those were the very drugs that were making his mental state improve, making him fit to face charges in SA!! Now he claimed yesterday that he had such severe post traumatic stress that the Judge said he didn't need to attend a 3 day extradition hearing (He is looking more & more guilty in my eyes &  devious too!!)

Carol McGiffin

Carol McGiffin was in the paper giving her verdict on a new low cal larger aimed at women called Animee, from Molson Coors. It comes in 3 varieties regular, rose & citrus, it doesn't say how many ml's the bottle is but at 107 I don't see how it's billed as low cal as a 300ml bottle of Stella is only 32cals more at 139 cals, and a 275ml bottle of Stella Dry only 12cals more at 119cals. A 250ml bottle of Heineken is less at just 75cals & the highest bottle of larger in my Calorie counter book is Gold Label at 141cals a bottle which is only 34cals more than Animee for me a low cal beer would have to be equal to a shot of Vodka or Rum 51cals which with a diet mixer is only 53 to 55cals!!


The price of Gold has Risen Greatly, but that moron Brown, while advised by Ed Milliband & Ed Balls, sold off half our gold, while Labour in power, at Very Low prices making a Loss!! The gold sold would now be worth £13Billion, which would of made a nice dent in our country's dept's, bloody idiots!!

The people at 'Is It Just Me But' have got back to Bob & I with 3 more filming dates in August (That's great news!!) My friend Richard has suggested meeting up in London before he moves to his new villa in the south of France. So I said I would be in London tomorrow & free after 4pm & left it in his court!


I had a Salad Roll with some Branston Mini Cheddars & a Cup-a-soup for lunch then did a bunch of housework chores & then applied to Fresh Casting, Universal Extras & Mad Dog Casting. Then watched 'the Real Housewives Of Orange county' with a Diet Coke & a Berry Berry Solero. Ian had been at an audition to be part of Junior Apprentice, but sadly wasn't picked. But my friend Maxine has started recording her Cameo role in EastEnders this week, can't wait to hear all about it when we meet up!! I watched a Maxine free EastEnders then made Dinner 3 Veggie Sausages, Roast Parsnips & a Fried Egg. With an apple & Diet Coke for Dessert yum!

Perou

I chatted a bit to photographer Perou on Twitter about 'Dirty Sexy Things' etc & was saying I liked the look of the Merman/Mermaid shoot that is on next weeks show, that we saw small snippets of as a trailer at the end of last nights show, he said the styling is fantastic, so I await with interest. There wasn't much else on TV so watched a bunch of repeats of CSI while job searching until 'Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmare's was on.


Rupert Murdoch was on TV earlier, re the phone hacking scandal, but I didn't bother watching, like I said before I'm bored with it all! Twitter was awash with updates anyway & I'm too bored of the whole thing to tune in! Some guy hit 80yr Murdoch with a foam custard pie, I guess Rupert will now drag him into the Clown Prosecution Service for the assault!!

I did a load of chores round the house, watered the plants etc & then chatted to my pal @BionikLoft & @goldiecraig on twitter then went to bed at 2am (Following Paul McKenna's 'I Can Make You Sleep Rules) Only going to bed once you feel tired!! (Calories consumed 1,577)


Wednesday 20th July (Family Fortunes: Christmas Special) I woke when my alarm went off at 8.30am got up and jumped in the bath for a soak to try and ease my very stiff & painful neck. Then I had a Golden Syrup Oat So Simple & a coffee for breakfast. Washed & dried hair & put in pony tail & added a hair piece, did my make-up The weather wasn't hot & wasn't cold but looked like rain so I wore black studded Jane Norman Leggings & my Black Crepe & Satin Dorothy Perkins, Kimono Top & my black suede pill on knee high KG boots, & my big dangley pail blue earrings, I pulled on my leopard print trench coat, & my Sequined shopper & set off early at 11.30am (Need to be there for 1.30pm) getting a Sun paper en route. 


I got to the station there was a huge queue of over 15 people & only 2 of the 4 windows were open (Typical!!) I couldn't use the ticket machines as I have a discount card & a staff member has to see that to issue my ticket, annoyingly most people in the queue were not there to catch a train, but to update student rail cards or their yearly/monthly ticket.


Two trains I could of got, annoyingly came & went while I was in the queue a 3rd arrived & was still at the platform when I finally got my ticket I got through barrier & right to the train & the doors closed inches from my nose, just before I could get on, I stood there & looked towards the drivers end of train, there was nobody on the platform except myself & the platform guard standing near the drivers window, I waved to him & indicated for him to get the train driver to open the doors. He saw me as he was looking at me & so was the driver, the train sat there for 2-3mins & then he whistled his whistle for it to set off which it did, making me very pissed off, if it was to sit there for 2-3mins anyway there was no reason why they couldn't let me on!! 


They were like bus drivers that wait watching you run for the stop & then pull out just as you get to the door!! I'm surprised he didn't open the doors part way & close them again before they were wide enough to get through!!..... Wankers!! I'd already been waiting over 20mins to get my soddin ticket, bloody useless Network South East Rail!!..... I walked up to the guy on the station & said "Why didn't you get the driver to let me on the train? I was the only one on the platform, it's not as if a hoard of people would of got on & held the train up, and it didn't leave for a few minutes anyway?!!" He just shrugged his shoulders & said "There is another one in 25mins!!" Great ..... Thanks arsehole!!! I went across to platform 3 to wait for the next London train, which thankfully was a semi fast one not a stopping one!! I got off at London Bridge, instead of Kings Cross as it's only two stops on the Jubilee line from there to Waterloo or one stop by train to Waterloo East.


Once on the train I read the paper the front cover of course is all about Rupert Murdoch (BORING!!) A much more amusing story comes on page 3, Fuming Liz Hurley is insisting Shane Warne doesn't wear make-up & his new look is down to losing 25lb (2st 1lb) Oh please Liz we are not idiots who are you trying to fool?? losing just over 2st may make your face more chiseled BUT it doesn't give a BLONDE haired man, BLACK LASHES!!! He may not of been wearing mascara but if he wasn't those lashes were definitely dyed!! Also nobody's lips are naturally that glossy!! If that wasn't lip-gloss then it was a tinted lip balm!!! Liz posted online "Shane Warne does not wear eye make-up or have a eyeliner tattoo, neither does he wear lip gloss & re looking different, you try losing 25lb & see if you do"

Shane Warne Before & After 25lb Loss, Make-up? You Decide!!

Liz looking A Bit Old Around Neck & Jowels (That's A 1st!!)

A weird sea beast's curved carcass has been washed ashore onto a beach in Aberdeen. Experts are still trying to work out what the 30ft beast is? Margaret Flippence 55 who found it said "It looked almost prehistoric!!"  Could it be the infamous Nessie who's taken a wrong turn????

Another Girl (Number 3) has come out saying he was also dating her while wooing Cheryl Cole to get her back (Proving like we all said she was a mug for getting back with him & talking kids!!) Once at London Bridge, the train was in 1min, so I decided to take that, I was just on the train to take the one stop to Waterloo East, when Atul Called to say he & Mandy had arrived. I said I was only one stop away & wouldn't be long, I got to Waterloo East & there was quite a lot of raised platform to walk through to get to the Waterloo station part & I knew my way to the Studios from there, the bloody cobbles en route there were not doing my dodgy knees or my heeled boots any good. But I could see the studios looming nearer on the horizon, Atul called again & said they're  at reception as we can go to the Greenroom as we are ITV guests.

Mandy & Atul 

I got to the studio at 1.32pm & spotted Atul, Mandy, & Ricky by the ITV receptions revolving door, we went inside to inform Henry we were ready to go to the Greenroom, we were waiting ages as he was busy running after the celebs, Fern Cotton came in & sat next to us in reception, waiting to be collected for whatever she was doing, she'd put on some weight & it really suited her, she looked less gaunt, my friends said I looked gaunt when I was 9st 5lb but I think I looked a lot better!! 


Due to staff delays/shortages we didn't end up in the greenroom & got directed straight to the studio & our seats instead. Like in the VT we did for the Benidorm team we had to wear Santa hats & Deeny Boppers!! I got Christmas Tree Deeny Boppers this time which were quite fun, Atul a Santa hat again, Ricky a red Cowboy hat with white marabou feather trim & Mandy candy cane Deeny Boppers!


We were sat behind the TOWIE team supporters & Harry was sat just in front of me wearing a festive looking red shirt. The set looked very festive with white Christmas Trees. The warm up man was very amusing & looked like a cross between Dale Winton & Host Vernon Kay. Vernon came out and bantered a bit with the audience? He is very charming & funny & loves a Haribo & wine gum, which he ponced from the audience (So if your in a Family Fortunes audience, take some Haribo's you will be a friend for life of Vernon's lol) The Two teams came out....

Team Benidorm:- Kenny Ireland (Swinger Donald Stewart) Janine Duvitski (Swinger Jackie Stewart) Elsie Kelly (Noreen Matby) Jake Canusa (Mateo Castellano) & a very cute Oliver Stokes (Naughty kid Michael Garvey) Team Captain Janine


Team TOWIE:- Mark Wright, Nanny Pat, Arg, Amy Childs & Joey Essex, Team Captain Mark


I am not going to spoil things to say which team won & who won spot prizes for audience members, you will have to watch Christmas Day & find out. You couldn't really see much of us in the Benidorm VT (Mostly us on the steps at the start & the tops of our heads) as quite a bit was cut. Oh well it was a fun day out anyway, and the actual 'Family Fortunes' show is funny. I can tell you though that Joey Essex turns out to be every bit as Intelligent as he is on TOWIE & Arg hasn't lost any of his weight! After the show was done & the team that had won, had made their charity money, they filmed trailers for the Xmas show having a snowball fight with a big snowman in the middle!! Atul nearly fell asleep a couple of times, then Atul had to leave as he was working at Heathrow on a night shift. 


So Mandy, Ricky & I went out of the studio & back into the reception, to wait for Henry to take us back to the Greenroom, while they cleared away the Christmas decorations. While there, Amy Childs & Mark who'd been joined by Jack Tweed were whizzed through Reception, to their waiting chauffeured car, with blacked out windows (Transport the TV companies lay on for you when your appearing on a show, I got loads of them, when I did chat shows in the late 80's early 90's) Mandy & I were laughing at all the screaming teens (& those old enough to know better) surrounding Amy & Marks car screaming & crying & declaring their love & begging for pictures. FFS their only reality TV personality's, it's not like they are A-list Celebs they are only on £50 a day (A  move up from just expenses which they got for last episodes)

Towering over TOWIE's Nanny Pat

Shortly after Marks Mum & Nanny Pat came down, with a young girl of around 10-13yrs which I'm guessing is a younger sister of Mark. His mum was slim & trim in a lovely navy dress but still had that same miserable expression of a bulldog chewing a wasp!! Does nothing make her happy? Or was she pissed she had to wait in reception for her car to arrive? I'm guessing Mark had an appointment elsewhere with Amy, or why else didn't his mum & Nanny Pat & the young girl travel with him? Nanny Pat is tiny like my late mum, I wouldn't be surprised if they were the same height (4ft 9") and I had a snap with her before they left. 


Then Henry came to take us to the Green Room cafe area as the next show didn't start until 6.30pm, so we had a drink & something to eat to keep us going, as we'd have no evening meal, I had some Salt & Vinegar Crisps & a Diet Coke at 1st, then later a blueberry muffin & cappuccino. Jake Canuso (Mateo) was in there with an older white haired guy, not sure if it was his dad or agent, or even sugar daddy? Chatting to the guy, who plays one of the fat gay guys in a couple on Benidorm, Mandy & I are sure Jake is gay, our gaydar is good! Denise Walsh was sat just the other side of the window in the garden part of the cafe area chatting on the phone looking very tanned & slim in a gray trouser suit.

Alan Carr

I spotted a guy with Alan Carr's dogs, a Red Setter with pink collar & lead & Red Setter puppy so adorable, the guy looking after Alan's dogs had the same hair & glasses as Alan & the same dress sense, so either Alan is his style icon, or he acts as a Alan decoy when Alan wants to escape the paps, as except for being a bit taller he looks very much like Alan. When I was cooing over the puppy a white haired woman, sat with a white haired guy with the dog minder (They might of been Alan's parents) said "You like? it it's yours!!" & said to the dog minder, when he reappeared down the corridor "I've given the puppy to this young lady!!" he joked "At least get a Tenner for it!!" "It's a deal!!" I replied. Alan wafted in, looking very well & then had to be whisked away to the make-up room in readiness for Chatty Man, 'Loose Women's' Carol McGiffen wafted through in a B&W top, black cropped trousers & white plimsolls with a outfit, in what looked like a dry-clean sleeve. Shortly after a very pretty but somewhat harassed looking Sherie Hewson wandered in, with a fab figure, in black leggings a trendy black top & fab long knee length chocolate boots, with a few large red rollers in her hair. Then I spotted a runner from 'Big Brothers Big Mouth' he was now working on Family Fortunes.

Vernon Kay

A while later Vernon Kay popped in to the greenroom cafe area & had a chat with Mandy about a mutual acquaintance, another comedian came in who I recognized of TV but not a household name, think he has been in a few comedies, though think he might be there, working as Alan Carr's warm up man. The Family Fortunes warm up man came in & had a chat, he said he liked my joke (He got some of the audience to tell jokes, my joke was the only one the audience laughed at, so I got Vernon's autographed Cue card as a prize) 


DJ Joe Wiley's family sat next to us & were a good laugh, the kids were very cute. I chatted to an amazingly slim Pauline Quirk, I loved her in 'Birds Of A Feather' & she is brilliant in 'Emmerdale', but I remember her 1st as a teen on her 'Pauline's Quirks' show, with Linda Robson & a band called The Arrows. She looks amazing thinner than she was as a teen & very pretty she looks 15yrs younger!!.

Matthew Horne

Matthew Horne came in the cafe area, then Henry came to take us to our reserved seats. The 1st show of two was about to start, when Mandy suddenly decided (After waiting about 2hrs) that she aught to go as she was filming a promo for the NEW Big Brother on Ch5 tomorrow & had to be up early. She knew she'd be home late if she stayed! 


The next show we saw was Joe Wiley's family, verses Pauline Quirks Family. Joe's lovely, fun, family was sat just behind us. Joe's dad on the panel line up was very funny & when you watch the show, look out for the word 'Horse' it just gets funnier & funnier, her son is a cheeky little cutie too!!... Pauline Quirks young handsome son is very funny & I'm sure will be an actor when he grows up, if he's not already a child actor!!.... Again I can't say who wins (Well I can.... but then it would spoil it for you) but it's an exciting game!!

Rita Simons

The 3rd & final show Ricky & I watched was Russell Kane's family verses Rita Simons (Roxy from Eastenders) family. The game was funny & manic for a bunch of reasons & Russ got a fab fun prezzie from Vernon (You will have to wait to see what!!) I have to say I never found Russ funny on the ITV2 'I'm a Celebrity' extra show & I only laugh occasionally at his stand up, but he seemed quite a nice animal lover on the show, also quite camp, at one point when one member of the Kane family mentioned the word 'Lizard' you will hear large whoops from Ricky & I (We made a pact if anyone said the word Lizard during the show we'd go crazy!!) which Vernon responded to, again I won't tell how, or who wins but I will say once the show is aired everyone will be shouting at Russell Kane "Get In The Vaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!"


We left around 10.30pm ish Ricky is filming more for a show on Essex tomorrow he is doing 2 shoots this week at £150 a day & he is doing 7 days next week (Nice work if you can get it!) & I got a train from Waterloo East, to London Bridge, then got the tube to Kings Cross. I bought tomorrows Sun paper from a vendor & got the Semi fast Bedford train at 11.32pm  & read the rest of today's paper, eventually getting in at 12.40am. I updated my Twitter & Facebook status & crashing out in bed shattered!! (Calories Consumed 1,869 oh dear)


Thursday 21st July, I woke in a lot of pain at 9am with my neck, shoulders, knee, hips, Coccyx. Also my right arm & hand were dead & had to be slapped back to get feeling again, despite laying on my back not my right side! I downed pain killers like crazy as the pain was quite excruciating & over my entire body except for my head & feet!! I made myself a coffee to take the tablets with & had an apple for breakfast as I could eat it lying down, while I waited for the pain to stop! Which took a very long time & even more painkillers!! Thank god it wasn't this bad yesterday!! At least I already had today's paper, so I read that while watching morning TV at the same time. The front page was that a 27yr Nurse, Rebecca Leighton, has been arrested over the spiked saline bags, she is being called 'The Saline Serial Killer' Great you cant even trust nurses now, it was bad enough when I was robbed by the ambulance crew, that I called out when in agony with Gallstones!!

Nurse, Rebecca Leighton

I read a bit of the paper, but not a great deal as I couldn't really concentrate due to the severe pain I was in, which was distracting, and making me feel miserable!! I got dressed in black leggings & a yellow vet top & scraped back my hair & didn't bother with make-up as I felt so rough. I watched the news (mostly doom & gloom) eventually the pain subsided enough for me to make some lunch (My tummy was rumbling at 2pm after only an apple & a coffee in the morning!!) So I had a large jacket potato with some tinned tuna mixed with low fat mayo & watched 'Jeremy Kyle' & 'The Real Housewives Of Orange County' My necks really bad, when I turn my head, I can hear a kind of crunching grinding noise, like footsteps on gravel. 

I got a email about a paid job doing a run through for a dating show & I had to send him a copy of my picture & dates I'm available, I also got called about a Quiz run through from Shine TV the guy said "Your name was put forward as an outstanding contestant & so I'd like to know if you will do the run through for the TV exec's at the start of August??"  I said "Yeah that sounds fine email me the dates & venue once you have them!" Lets hope I'm not like this, whenever it is!!...

Later I watched 'Home & Away' then with the pain lessened a bit I did some household chores, going to need to order some sale smart trousers for catalogue for a few audition roles coming up soon, I sold my old ones as they were too big & now I'm too big to fit in my size 8 & 10 ones. I looked online & ordered 2 pairs of black trousers in size 12 & 14 (just in case with my expanding hips!!) & one size 14 chocolate pair as they didn't have any 12's left in stock, from Kays & Co) Then I made a small jacket potato with 3 vegetarian sausages & a bit of green salad. With a Berry Berry Solero (only 99cals) for dessert yum (Something to take my mind off the pain!!) I watched the soaps & the brilliant 'The Killing' then I went to bed with a decaf coffee & pain killers as the pain was getting horrific again at 10.30pm (Calories consumed 1,451)


Friday 22nd July, Woke in a lot of pain again this morning at 8am, & took painkillers with a load of mineral water. I can't wait for this to be sorted, hate being in constant pain, it's making me miserable. I waited for the painkiller to kick in, then had a wash & made a plain Oat So Simple & a Diet Coke for breakfast, I wore my jeggings & my pink t-shirt & scraped back my hair as I felt too rough to do my hair or make-up. I resorted out the back room again (Carefully no sudden, movements with my neck & shoulder probs) as it had got in disarray when I had to dig out some of my photographic stuff, that I'd sold on eBay!! But I'd been in too much pain the last two weeks to put everything back again neatly, I was still in much too much pain again today but I just couldn't bare the mess any more even though it's a room I spend very little time in!!... 


I put away my dry laundry in the draws & wardrobes, I popped to the shop to get a paper & some milk & was just paying when a delivery guy with a parcel poked his head in & asked the shopkeeper if he knew where an address was, the address he was asking for was mine ironically, so I took parcel & signed for it, that was quick I was expecting it Monday, parcel force is obviously 1000 times better than Royal Mail, which is pot luck if you get what you have been sent!!....


Though that delivery guy obviously didn't look that hard for my address, it's not that hard to find if you use logic! No wonder I don't get half of my post, if all postal people are as inept as him!! Checked Facebook & Twitter & Hotmail account for messages, saw awful news of Bomb Attack in Oslo Norway by Extremist scum, & also the horrific homophobic attack of a man in the wee hrs of this morning. Bastards I hope the vile couple are arrested & battered to an inch from their lives in jail!! You can read more on that story HERE

Do You Recognize This Homophobic Trash??

I made a Tuna & Cucumber Sandwich on wholemeal bread for lunch which I had with some Chilli Crisps & a Diet Coke & some more pain killers!! Bloody pain!! I have so many half done blogs as I have to stop, as the typing aggravates my painful neck & shoulders!! I popped to the shop & got a some Diet Cokes & a Sun newspaper & reclined to read it while the pain killers hopefully kicked in!! The headline was 'Now There's 5 Dead' re the Saline killings. Plus Lady Gaga 'I was addicted to coke ... now I just smoke'


I couldn't help laughing at an article on what the paper called a balding bug eyed monkey (looked more like a bald bush baby or sloth to me!) Which sparked panic in a village who thought it was an alien, Mao Xiping found the poor malnourished thing stealing cucumbers from her flat, she trapped it in a washing basket & took it to the police station, insisting the police arrest it (I nearly wet myself laughing at that bit ha haha ha!!) The poor, hungry, cute, little thing, stopped eating cucumbers once given peaches & now wont eat anything else, lol getting choosy, I think its damn cute!!

Alien I Don't Think So!!!

I watched 'The Real Housewives Of Orange County' with my favourite housewife, the lovely Gretchen Rossi who gets such a tough ride (With no good reason) from the other rather bitchy housewives, Gretchen DM's me occasionally on Twitter & is really sweet I just don't know how anyone can dislike her (Other than jealousy over her beauty & success) Maybe they just can't believe anyone can be, beautiful, silicone free & also be a genuinely nice, caring person, with no ulterior motives!! Then I watched an old 'Come Dine With Me' set in Aberdeen, that I'd not seen before, Rick the gay guy seemed sweet, the Asian/Phillipino woman, Laura was a pain in the arse tho & Bob was like a fussy Victor Meldrew!! Loved drag queen 'Cherry Bakewell' picking on dour Bob!!


More Info came up on Twitter, the same bastard that set off the Bomb in Oslo Norway, he has machine gunned a group of kids camping on an Island, around 50 is the estimated death toll of the two atrocities WTF????? He seems to be a Blonde Norwegian not even one of those Taliban bastards!! What's the world coming to? I watched 'Home & Away' then made tea of two burger buns with a Quorn veggie burger in each with some Gouda cheese, cucumber, mustard & Low fat mayo & enjoyed it with a glass of Chilean Santa Alvara Merlot that I got on my Birthday from my bank with 5 other bottles.

 My Gift From My Bank For Reporting Fraud

The Merlot On The Left

I watched  very funny '8 Out Of 10 Cats' which was filmed on Wednesday when I was at ITV it was What Sherrie, Denise & Carole McGiffen were getting done up for, Matt Horn who we also saw was on there too. Then I watched Chis Moyle's a bit, just for Vernon Kay & Jack Whitehall. Then watched the film 'Vanilla Sky' with Tom Cruise, before crashing out at 12.40am shattered. (Calories consumed 1,683)


Saturday 23rd July, Woke at 9am, to a rather grey and dismal day had a wash & made myself an Oat So Simple, with Golden Syrup & a Caffeine Free Diet Coke, pulled on my jeggings & long tie dye turquoise vest top, my denim jacket, plus my TrimSoles & went to the shop for a Sun paper & some more Diet Cokes & settled down with the paper with a Diet Coke. The front page of the paper was of course all about the Norwegian nutcase who slaughtered many by bomb and gun in Norway, plus the nurse has been charged with the saline deaths, as well as theft of medicine from the hospital. 


More hospital madness comes in the form that £100's of taxpayers cash is being spent on motorbike couriers, to ensure heroine addicts get their daily fix of methadone FFS!!! The NHS shell out £30 a time to bike prescriptions instead of 46p for a stamp, because inept staff have failed to post them in time! Up to £120 a day is spent on couriers due to fear that junkies will complain about not getting their fix on time! The more shocking news is, that some junkies have been given twice their dosage by panicking NHS staff who are struggling to keep on top of the drug prescriptions.


A bit of sense comes in the form that there will be no charge for the homeowner who stabbed a burglar (John Bennell 27) to death, when 4 of them, one wielding a machete broke into his home. It was judged he used reasonable force to protect himself when under siege! The 3 other men charged in connection to the break in are due in court in September! More good news is that we are due summer weather this weekend, with temp expected to reach 26C/79F by Wednesday!


Then there is the story of a dumb ex air stewardess Brenda, from West Sussex, who was scammed out of £50K by a Nigerian scam artist on a UK dating site .... FFS how gullible are these women? These guys are so bleeding obvious to spot, they tell the same bleeding heart story every time, and always have some fake Caucasian pic some stupidly model pics, yet type how a black man/ Nigerian talks She must be thick! She (Brenda Park 62) thought she was in a phone & email relationship with a 46yr blonde Dutch widower called Bradford, claiming to live in Birmingham with his 14yr old daughter. But he was a black conman living in Largos Nigeria. I'm sure I'd spot the way he typed was not a white man & if she spoke on phone he must of hid his accent well and spoke in a damn good Dutch/Brummie accent, or got a white con pal to talk on phone (What about the phone number? surely he had a Nigerian code in front of number? & if he called her didn't she 1471?? As I read on, I saw he used the same old sob story they all use a variety of variation's, all involving a tragedy/accent involving a child, after already losing a wife)


One that tried to con me, made me laugh so hard once, he told me how he lost his wife in a horrific tube crash the week of her birthday, two years prior, obviously knowing of very no recent tube crashes (This was before the tube bombs) I Googled the year he said & tube crashes, yet as expected there were NONE!! Then in casual conversation, chatting about his late wife, I turned the conversation round to star signs, asking his & then later his wife's, saying how compatible they were!! 


Then with this info I searched again for a tube crash in London the year he said covering the 2 months her supposed sign fell into & as expected still NO results!! So I broadened it to 10ys either side of that year, in those two months & of course still NOTHING!! He gave the same old bullshit they often use, of being American/English oil rig worker working in Africa/Nigeria (So when the sob story starts it supposedly won't seem odd to be sending ££ to Africa/Nigeria) Some lazy Nigerian morons use this old tried & tested method & do no research of the UK. One laughingly told me he was an English man working on a oil rig in Nigeria & not only typed in pigeon English, but in a typically Nigerian fashion, plus he told me he was from Manchester in London LMFAO!!!... I told him I was from Edinburgh in Wales & he of course, didn't question it, Dumb Fucks!!


Anyway back to Brenda's stupidity! After a month of online chat/phone calls, he said he & his daughter had had a car crash while on a business trip to Africa (So it won't seem odd to wire ££ to Africa again!!) Why did she not question why he'd take a 14yr old on his business trip? STUPID Brenda then wired a man SHE HAD NEVER MET £9,000 for hospital bills (Did she not question why he took his daughter abroad on a business trip & didn't take out travel insurance??) Followed by £40,000 for flights back to the UK!! She must have Gullible Moron stamped on her forehead!! Brenda said "My conscience would not let me leave a young girl in that situation so I sent the money!" Did she not think to ask about the crash, how it happened & where? Then Google to find any news of such an accident, or to any accidents in the area that the cash was to be wired to?? 


I can't believe people can be so dumb/naive!! Brenda is on a Ch4 documentary '491: The Internet Romance Scam' named after (491) the number for fraud in Nigeria's penal code, on Friday 29th July. Brenda drove to the address he'd given online in Birmingham & of course nobody fitting his description lived there, an Asian family did. Idiot she should of asked to speak online on webcam to him, I always do that, before I'd meet anyone I'd 1st got talking to online, to check the image matches the picture, if they make excuses why they can't, then I take it they are a bullshitter & a wrongun/married  & wean them off, or block. 


You can see the documentry up until August 28th if you click HERE  Hint to the easily fooled if a message has the subject line 'Hello Pretty' and/or at some point in his message he says he is looking for a god fearing woman (Why are they more gullible??) your chatting to a Nigerian Scammer!! They seem to work from same script, so now your warned, but if you get conned don't come running to me crying!!... Your obviously a bloody idiot!!


I did some housework then made some lunch of 2 Quorn veggie burgers in a bun with salad cheese, mayo & mustard, with some McCoy Chilli Crisps, Yummy!! I did a load of job searches & applied online for a bunch, then I did the same on my audition sites. Chatted a bit on Facebook & heard on the news that Tyson Fury who is in the 'St Georges Day' film I'm in, has won The Commonwealth Heavy Weight Boxing Championship. Went on twitter & the last tweet from Norway nutcase that slaughtered a bunch of innocents yesterday was being retweeted on Twitter (see bellow)

AndersBBreivik Anders B. Breivik 

One person with a belief is equal to the force of 100 000 who have only interests.

I did some tweeting to friends & then the news came over Twitter that Amy Winehouse had been found dead in her Camden home of a suspected overdose.... Sadly that is no surprise after the recent state she was seen in recently on the news & online, staggering all over stage unable to sing when supposedly meant to be performing in concert abroad (Her Management should never allowed her on stage in that state, nor should they of allowed her to get in the state) What the fuck were they thinking? They know what she is like why didn't they watch her like a Hawk while supposedly on tour/working?? Fans tweeted her dad concerned last week concerned & sadly her dad was not as concerned & told them on the 12th of July the message bellow!!

mitchwinehouse mitch winehouse 

Amy is fine. Don't worry.

Obviously she wasn't fine & now she is dead at just 27yrs, what a waste of a life!! All over drugs, thank god I have no interest in drugs nor get the appeal to even dabble.... 

 Drugs Aren't Cool Kids, They Turn You From This !!

To This!!!...... Say No To Drugs!!

I watched 'Odd One In' then the brilliant Camelot with the very sexy Leontes who will sadly die so Arthur can get with Guinevere, Leontes Actor 'Philip Winchester' should play the lead Arthur he is 1000 times sexier!!! Nobody in their right mind would cheat on that 100% beefsteak for wimpy gormless looking Arthur 'Jamie Capbell Bower' (Tho to give him credit, he is a decent actor!!) But Leontes/Philip Phwoooooooor!!!!

 Philip Winchester 

 As Leontes In Camelot

 Leontes All Man

Arthur - Jamie Capbell Bower 

After that I watched 'Kingdom Of Heaven' a Orlando Bloom film about the Crusades, which should of been right up my street but up until the last 30-45mins I found it pretty slow & boring! While enjoying a Solero Berry Berry & some Haribo Sours with a glass or two of Merlot red wine.Then the 'Bad Lieutenant' which is a fucking odd film with Harvey Keitel giving us a full frontal pretty early on in the film!! Went to bed at 2.45am (Calories consumed 1,653)


Sunday 24th July, I woke at 9am to a sunny day, which was good news as I was meeting Andrea & Sarah for lunch at the Peahen. So I had a bath & pulled on my studded 3/4 leggings, my grey & black leopard print long vest top with silver studding, my black cotton long sleeved shrug & my silver gladiator sandals & diamante earrings & bracelets, Dried my hair in a shaggy style & did a light make-up, made a Oat So Simple in apple flavour, with some cinnamon, and a coffee I watched some TV then grabbed my black sequined tote bag & set off to meet the girls at The Peahen at 1pm, it was lovely & sunny out getting warmer by the minute

Got to The Peahen and checked inside 1st before quickly finding Sarah & Andrea in the large Beer Garden in the sunshine with a bottle of Rose, which we shared between us we ordered lunch, Sarah had a fish dish, Andrea a roast (beef I think) & I had a veggie burger with salad & potato wedges. Which was very tasty, Andrea said she had ran into Candie at a local fete & Candie said she was very concerned about me, saying I was putting on a good front, but she could tell I was very down & depressed & deeply unhappy (You can't pull the wool over Candies eyes) 


Andrea said "What are you unhappy about?" I said "What is there to be happy about? My mum, favourite aunt & cat have died, I'm unemployed despite applying for over 50 jobs a week, that I am more than capable of, as well as at least 20 auditions a week, I'm broke, in debt, In constant pain due to spinal problems, the pain has made me not able to use the gym much, so I have gained 2.5st, I'm struggling to pay my rent & bills & I haven't had a relationship in over 10yrs so feel like I have no emotional support to prop me up now mums gone! I got none from my siblings when mum died they left me to cope alone, even my doc supposedly treating me for depression left me high & dry & benefit fuck ups left me penniless & food-less (except from leftovers donated from local friends) for 6 months plunging me into debt with bank charges they caused that I am still in debt due to & still trying to pay off 2yrs later"

We chatted about this & that & Andrea's work & her new cat & Sarah's job as a fitness trainer. The sun got really hot so I had to take off my shrug, we had some Eaton Mess for desert which was nice but seemed to have more cream than meringue or berry's, washed down with Rekorderlig Strawberry Cider (Yum)

The girls had to go around 4-5pm & we said our goodbyes & said to catch up soon then they walked to their car & I walked home & sat out in the sun & bought a Sunday Star to read sat out in the sun in my courtyard. Obviously the front headlines are 'Amy Is Dead, Tragic star's body found in flat' plus 'Final moments of killers 92 victims' Re the Norway madman's killings in Oslo. Apparently he was some Nazi angry at the influx of Muslims in Norway, but if that's so & what the slaughter was all about, why was he slaughtering his own countrymen & their children, & not the Muslims he was supposedly so anti?? It just doesn't add up & make sense!!


A friend of Amy Winehouse Joe Mott said he'd seen Amy days earlier & she was a wreck, telling him she was in agonizing pain. Her friend could see it how could her dad not... tweeting Amy is fine on July 12th!! Talking of drugs, detectives probing the saline serial killings are hunting at least 2 other hospital workers. Meanwhile nurse Rebecca Leighton appeared before magistrates yesterday, breaking down during the 20min proceeding, she was to be charged with 6 charges of damage to saline with the intention of endangering life & also of theft of medicine. 


Cheryl Cole supposedly says she will never go back to Ashley after recent revelations (Once apon a time I'd of said good but I'm so sick of the saga now I don't care!!) She is apparently talking to Simon Cowell again (No doubt she has sussed she is fucked without him!!) Apparently she heard of him sleeping with the stewardess on Saturday before the story broke Sunday & text Ashley immediately 'It's Over' meanwhile scumbag Ashley didn't bother replying until Monday (When she had heard about a 2nd woman) saying he didn't want her back anyway! Well hopefully that's the end of the on off, on off, bore that is Ashley & Cheryl!!

Apparently the suspect groom in the Honeymoon Hijack murder case Shrien Dewani told his murdered bride the day before they wed "Whoever dressed you should be fired!" upsetting bride to be Anni & rightly so she looked stunning in her hot pink sari! The more you hear the more he seems involved!

At 8pm I came in from the sun feeling peckish but not hungry enough for a full meal so I had a Quorn fillet in a bun with some Mayo & a Diet Coke then at 9pm I watched the film 'The Lovely Bones' which was a well filmed twist on a murder film, seen from the eyes of the dead victim! feeling tired for a change I went to bed at 11.30pm & crashed out. (Calories consumed aprox 2,504 whoops!!)